I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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