she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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