No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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