he thought i was a dude.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Randomize
