She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Randomize