small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Randomize
