There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
