I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize