doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
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