My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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