a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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