she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Sorry about my life...
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
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