Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Randomize
