Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
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