Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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