I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
