i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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