he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
