Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
