Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Randomize
