just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize
