shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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