Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
false alarm. still invincible.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Randomize