Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
