So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
you would pick up someone in the library
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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