Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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