I think I am morally bankrupt
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
