Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
how drunk are you?
Several
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
