Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
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