its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
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so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
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