You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
Your mouth is God's brothel.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Randomize
