For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
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