Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
i would punch a child for taco bell
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Just pee around me
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Randomize