Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
