at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
