that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
