party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I'm having to shit out rocks
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