so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Randomize
