I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
