Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
Randomize