i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Randomize
