It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
