Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
