Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize
