Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
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