Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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