**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
