i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Randomize
