trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
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