babies were throwing up all over the place
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
